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Top Dumbemployed

At work today, I emailed my re-re-re-re-recorrected report to my boss, who was working from home. He called me up on my way home (35mi commute) to tell me I sent the wrong report. After 30 minutes of him accusing me of being incompetent, he realized he was opening the wrong email. I'm dumbemployed.

by officemonkey on 03/28/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (13) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( reports commuting accusation )

At work today, there was a row of interviewees in the reception room. I noticed there was also a line going outside the building. I have a job here- it isn't that good. But on the way out, I think someone tried to bribe me for work. I'm dumbemployed.

by eliagrijalva on 03/21/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( interviews reception lines )

At work today, we started scanning IDs instead of using our punchcards to punch in. Our boss stood next to the scanner the entire time. He said he didn't trust it. It's a scanner. If he wanted to catch people being bad, he should have checked out the break room. I'm dumbemployed.

by madir on 03/26/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( ids scanner beak room )

At work today, I had two college aged kids claim to have AAA memberships and, therefore, a discount. I asked for their membership numbers or their cards. They looked at each other and ran into the woods. Then they came back because I hadn't opened their car yet. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/26/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( aaa college kids running )

At work today, I asked a woman if she wanted her groceries in "Paper or Plastic". She replied "Milk". I put them in plastic.
I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/28/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( grocery paper plastic )

At work today, I was restoring a really nice old desk from the 1910s. I'd finally finished applying varnish to the top when I examined the bottom. The legs were intact, but on the bottom of this five thousand dollar desk, some little kid had stuck a wad of gum. A big wad. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/28/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( restoration desk varnish )

At work today, I was showing a house to a very young couple. I thought it might be out of their price range, but these days you never know how much kids make. They asked a few good questions and I answered. Then they asked me if they could rent instead of buy. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/25/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( real estate rental buy )

At work today, I had two customers come into the restaurant. I recognized one- and I knew the woman he was with wasn't his wife. When he left he winked at me and stretched out his hand. "It's a secret," he said. I looked at my hand- he'd given me two dollars. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/23/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( affair two dollars cheating )

At work today, I had a customer come in whose English wasn't too good, but I couldn't tell what nationality he was. Anyway, he sat down in the chair and I started cutting his hair. I asked him what kind of hair cut he wanted. "Skunk look," he said proudly. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/28/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( english barber skunk look )

At work today, I showed my boss a new draft of some stories that I've been working on for our company newsletter. He stared at it for a while and grimaced. "Once the newsletter gets popular," he said, "maybe we'll actually get some good stories." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/27/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( journalist stories newsletter )

At work today, I spent my entire shift switching the light switch on and off. Productive? Not so much. But halfway through, I did get to leave my desk to replace the light bulb I'm broken. It should be obvious by now. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/25/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( light switch light bulb broken )

At work today, I mowed my neighbor's long for the princely rate of five dollars per yard (front and back). I finished after three hours and went to get my money. He had a big smile on his face. He said he had a tip for me too. I was happy. Then he handed me a Sacajawea dollar. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/27/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( lawn mowing sacajawea was a cheapskate )
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