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At work today, I called my boss to ask when and where I could meet him to get my check since it's Friday, I needed the cash, and he was apparently "Working from home." He pauses a moment, then responds "What check?" Um, construction project engineer is NOT a volunteer job, sir. I'm dumbemployed.

by officemonkey on 11/19/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( volunteer check payday )

At work today, my boss told me that there's going to be a Harry Potter theme park. He revealed that he was going to get tickets the first day. I smiled and told him it was cool. Yeah. Cool. He's 37 years old. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/19/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( harry potter old theme park )

At work today, someone asked if we have any meals without meat. I work at KFC. I'm dumbemployed.

by AllieOnly on 11/19/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( kfc meat vegetarian )

At work today, I was walking down the sidewalk holding hands with my fiancé. "Red Rover!" my coworker shouted. He barreled down at us. We were gonna let him through, but he tripped before he got to us. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/19/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( red rover sidewalk hands )

At work today, an anxious tremor began to come over me. I was finally going to ask out Darlene, the receptionist who I love. Well, I will have to wait a little longer. She came in today with her partner. Who's a girl. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/18/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( darlene receptionist anxious )

At work today, my shoes kept getting untied and I got made fun of a lot. I double knotted them to show all those jerks! Then I realized I'd tied my shoes together. I let them mock me, now. I'm dumbemployed.

by severals on 11/18/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( shoes laces tied )

At work today, we were taking pictures of the office for the company newsletter. I managed to take about forty when I decided to check how it had gone. Turns out I had taken forty pictures. But I had the lens cap on. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/18/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( newsletter pictures lens cap )

At work today, my cubicle neighbor kept hitting the wall between us. I coughed a couple of times to try and get him to stop. He didn't. I said his name. He kept going. I stood up and looked over the wall. He wasn't hitting his hand. He was hitting his head. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/18/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( cubicles head hitting )

At work today, I experienced my first day on the job with crutches. My union guarantees me work, and I go in because I have a family. Turns out the job is a little harder than I thought. I'm a construction worker. With two broke legs. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/17/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (0) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( union crutches legs )

At work today, I saw a girl leave her two year old daughter in the car as she came into the store. I walked up to her and told her she needed to bring the girl in. "Oh no," the woman said. "I don't want to cause any trouble." I had to break the girl out myself. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/17/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( car daughter locked )

At work today, I was at the grocery introducing some older customers to Indian food. One old man walked over slowly and tapped me on the shoulder. "Don't Indians eat buffalo?" he asked. I didn't have the heart to tell him they didn't. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/17/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( indian food buffalo old people )

At work today, I left something in the microwave about a minute too long because I was on a sales call. When I got to the kitchen, my boss was standing over my plate, glaring. "You don't care about this company," he said. I just closed a 30,000 dollar sale. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 11/17/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( sales microwave kitchen )
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