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At work today, I was watching old SNL clips at my desk. My boss came up behind me and started laughing. Loud. Until I closed the window. Passive aggressive much? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/25/14 at 9:04pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( snl clips window )

At work today, my company crafted a mission statement. It took us about an hour to figure it out. It's in Latin. The only problem is that none of us know Latin. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/25/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( mission statement latin hour )

At work today, these somewhat frightening men came inside the bar. I asked them what they wanted. They snarled. For Cosmos. I made them three times just to make sure I got it right. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/25/14 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( frightening cosmos bar )

At work today, I burned a new CD to play on our company's computer. Then I realized that I work at a great place- we still use floppy discs. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/25/14 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( cd floppy discs computer )

At work today, I had a customer ask me to "really push the envelope." We make banners for small businesses. Buddy, you can only push the envelope so far. I'm dumbemployed.

by sparklydragon on 10/25/14 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( envelope banners orders )

At work today, my boss wanted me to research something and he told me to "Bing it." Am I in a Microsoft commercial all of a sudden? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/24/14 at 9:04pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( research google bing )

At work today, the newspaper had an article about my business. The only problem? We are a fast food restaurant catering to teens. None of our customers will ever see the story. It's tragic. And unlucky. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/24/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( newspaper article teens )

At work today, the head of the PTA asked me how her son was doing in my class. I told her he was getting straight Cs. She frowned and then winked. "What if I threw some bakesale dough your way?" I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/24/14 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( bakesale bribe pta )

At work today, a lab took off running with my hand caught in his leash. He flipped me over the cart that carries 80 lb bags of dog food. Landed on my knee. Doc says I need physical therapy for six weeks. The dog's name was Chuck Norris. Guess he knows dog fu. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/24/14 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( dog veterinarian doctor )

At work today, my boss decided to send an email to the floor putting his foot down. The subject line read "Reply that you have read and understood what I am SAY". No I do not understand what you "am SAY." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/24/14 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( email floor grammar )

At work today, we shared a recruitment stand with a secretarial staffing firm. We counsel people on going back to school. It was a recruitment fair- ying and yang, very awkwardly paired. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/23/14 at 9:04pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( secretary staffing recruiting )

At work today, my boss's ex-wife sauntered into the office. She demanded that he talk to her and I heard them yelling. Apparently, she thinks half of his cubicle belongs to her in the settlement. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/23/14 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( ex-wives cubicles settlement )
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