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At work today, I was given a very interesting assignment. My boss is giving a speech to industry big wigs and wants ten "totally unknown" factoids about the business. I work in water pipe maintenance. And the factoids have to be interesting. This could take a while. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( water maintenance factoids speech )

At work today, first blood was drawn in the corporate volleyball tournament. We won. But tomorrow we're playing against the Heglin twins. They're over six feet tall. And Swedish. I spent all day today studying volleyball strategy. I'm dumbemployed.

by bastet_mau on 09/21/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( twins swedish volleyball )

At work today, I spoke to an efficiency expert who wants to hack my employees away, unless I can find a way to justify each of them. The kicker? He wants a page about each one. I have fifty people working under me and a lot of work to do. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( efficiency layoffs summary )

At work today, I finally finished outlining the presentation I was going to make to our board. Then I noticed a lonely little line hidden at the bottom of the assignment email. They want Powerpoint too. Now I'm stuck all night learning how to use it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/21/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( presentation board powerpoint )

At work today, I was composing some poetry on an extra napkin. Deal with it. Because my coworker couldn't. He stole the napkin from me and read it aloud to the entire staff. My poem was about a boy I had a crush on. So much for that. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( poetry napkin jerk )

At work today, a motivational speaker came to my summer school class. It's a great break for me. But I don't think he was screened very well- this guy cursed nonstop. And I work at an elementary school. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( motivational speaker cursing summer school )

At work today, we were reviewing Supreme Court cases in order to prepare a summary about Sotomayor. Summer is so fun! I told my mom what I was doing and she clapped. "I love the Supremes!" she said. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/20/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (0) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( lawyer supreme court sotomayor )

At work today, I kept getting looks from my coworker Creepy McCreeperson. That's my name for him. He wasn't supposed to be scheduled today, but I found out from a coworker that he rescheduled his shift to work next to me. I think he skipped school for it too. I'm dumbemployed.

by sumo_momo on 09/20/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( creep rescheduled shift )

At work today, there was a big survey we gave all of our customers. It went ok. They were asked to rate everything in the restaurant on a scale of 1-5. I knew that would be a problem. Half the customers seemed to use a scale of 1-10. Who knows what the other half did. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/19/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( surveys scale error )

At work today, everyone was feeling depressed over the heat and the recession. So we turned on the sprinkler and let all the employees run through. A few customers did too. The bad part is that we're an electronics store. It wasn't the safest idea. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/19/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( depressing heat sprinkler )

At work today, I saw this kid who looked just like Taylor Lautner. I told him and he looked offended. I said it was a compliment. Then he told my boss that I called him a werewolf. I actually got in trouble, too. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/19/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( taylor lautner werewolf twilight )

At work today, two of our customers were debating about the best Michael Jackson song. One of them said it was "Billie Jean." The other one? He thought the best song was "Ice Ice Baby." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 09/19/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( michael jackson vanilla ice debates )
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