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At work today, our front door was broken, so I put a sign on it not to use it. That didn't stop at least five people from slamming their heads into the glass. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/18/18 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( front door broken glass )

At work today, I headed a roundtable of our customers discussing a myriad of important issues. Translation? I led a children's book group reading of "Goodnight Moon." I'm dumbemployed.

by pack_brothers on 12/17/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( roundtable children reading )

At work today, my manager gave me a five minute speech about being late. Her voice seemed to get impossibly higher as she went on. Why do I have to work for someone who talks at a frequency only dogs can hear? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/17/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( speech squeak voice )

At work today, I tacked up a picture of my kids on my cubicle wall. That single tiny tack created a fissure that rippled through the whole wall. Budget cuts. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/17/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( cubicles tack pictures )

At work today, I was forced to conduct a survey via phone- I need 200 responses before I leave. So far, I have 3 responses and 58 hang ups as soon as I called. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/17/18 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( phone responses telemarketers )

At work today, my coworker declared herself a "radical feminist." I think that's her code for saying she slept with the intern. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/16/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( sex radical feminist intern )

At work today, we were writing the day's specials on the chalkboard. And I swear, right after I left, I saw a customer approach the board with his own stick of chalk. You can't do that! I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/16/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( chalk chalkboard specials )

At work today, my boss insisted on checking my code in Microsoft Internet Explorer. Uh oh. That means I'll be fixing it for another six months. I'm dumbemployed.

by ub3rlyn00b3rly on 12/16/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( microsoft internet explorer code )

At work today, I stood up for my rights. I fought for justice. I maintained my dignity! I insisted that my 15 minute break be a full fifteen minutes instead of 12. I've never felt more pitiful. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/16/18 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( rights justice break )

At work today, a plastic surgery patient came into our office. I just work reception. I asked her if she was happy with the surgery. "I would be," she said, "if I could smile." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/15/18 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( plastic surgery smiling reception )

At work today, I caught my coworker picking his nose. Gross. When I called him on it, he had a defense. "I needed to adjust my brain," he said. "From the inside." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/15/18 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb

At work today, a young man plopped some condoms on my cash register. That's normal. Except by young, I mean about 11 years old. I said nothing. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 12/15/18 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( condoms cash register young )
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