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At work today, we installed a new security camera system in the building. It looks like we needed it. We didn't catch any criminals or anything like that. But we did see the CEO hooking up with a prostitute in the parking lot. I'm dumbemployed.

by oakenthrone on 02/09/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( security camera ceo prostitute )

At work today, our boss announced that he wanted to start a work book club. OK, whatever- it's worth a try. Then we found out the first selection. Sir, Dr. Seuss is not appropriate for adults. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/09/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( book club selection dr. seuss )

At work today, I was a little hesitant about leaving early, but everyone insisted that it was totally fine. I cut out ten minutes early. Thirty minutes after that, I received a text message. Apparently, my supervisor thought that I had suddenly quit. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/09/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( leaving quit supervisor )

At work today, I kept getting interrupted at my desk by the daughter of one of our employees. She was asking me all these questions that five year olds shouldn't be asking. Like about stock options. I think that she was being used as a spy. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/08/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( daughter spy stock options )

At work today, I spoke to our Chief Financial Officer, who is apparently eyeing a number of cuts in services. Like, you know how we get paid during lunch now. That's about to be a thing of the past. Hello 8.5 hour days. My life just got shorter. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/08/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( cfo lunch unpaid )

At work today, I was tasked with rewriting the employee guidebook on etiquette. It was an OK project, and a little interesting to try and make up the rules. Plus, the entire time, my cubicle mate was looking at online dating sites. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/08/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( online dating etiquette handbook )

At work today, I caught a case of the hiccoughs. Not really a big deal, right? It only took about a minute for me to get better and then I was breathing normally. The only problem? I'm an actor and I was on stage. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/08/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( actor hiccoughs stage )

At work today, I was supposed to watch the subway turnstiles to make sure none of the people jumped them. I saw somebody and started chasing after him but got stopped by my coworker. "Don't mind him," he said. "That's my brother." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/07/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( turnstiles subway nepotism )

At work today, one of our biggest readers requested a used book we didn't have. Still, I was impressed by his taste and promised to get it for him. The next guy in line wasn't so good. He wanted to get a "first edition" of the daVinci Code. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/07/16 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( reader books davinci )

At work today, I had a skinny waif come in to our hot dog stand. She asked for a real Chicago style hot dog. Then she proceeded to ask that there be no mustard, relish, lettuce, tomatoes, or bun. I'm dumbemployed.

by hagu_murakami on 02/07/16 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( skinny hot dog chicago )

At work today, I needed to translate an instruction manual from English to Spanish. Fun! My boss came over to my desk and looked at it. "Me Habla Spanish," he said and winked at me. No, sir, you don't habla. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/07/16 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( english spanish translate )

At work today, my boss announced he was establishing a company gym membership plan. At first, I was really excited. Then I saw the gym. It was an exclusive boxing training area. My boss boxes. Nobody else does. It's great for him, I guess. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/06/16 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( gym boxing training )
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