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At work today, we had everyone sit in benches to be served. It's the usual. One guy demanded a chair and, like usual, we caved. Once he got the chair though, he said he felt "lonely" and sat back on the bench again. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/21/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (1) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( benches chair lonely )

At work today, I was forced to do jury duty. So I guess that the witnesses are my customers. Well, one of them had to have the oath repeated to them three times. She couldn't remember a single sentence without help. I'm dumbemployed.

by ub7com_friender on 10/21/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( jury duty witnesses oath )

At work today, somebody reported that there was a break in at our building at work. We were all pretty scared when we saw how messed up it all was. But the real culprit? Not a robber. It was a cat somebody had brought to work. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/21/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( break in cat mess )

At work today, I opened the blinds only to find that it was a cloudy day outside. Bummer. When I turned back to my desk, my boss said that I'd been wasting "valuable company time." He was actually serious. I'm actually depressed. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/20/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( blinds company time depressing )

At work today, the mailman was loitering outside our building for a while. He wasn't smoking or resting. Turns out he was examining a butterfly for 20 minutes. Through rain, sleet, and snow they deliver. But butterflies are another matter. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/20/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( mailman butterflies loitering )

At work today, I was delivering pizzas as usual. The drag was that I had to use a bicycle instead of my beat up car. I got honked at twice for the way I was holding the pizza. Then somebody pulled up beside me and asked for a slice. That's not how it works. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/20/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( pizza delivery bicyclists )

At work today, I was refreshing my stock portfolio instead of working. Typical. And, of course, it wasn't going very well. By the time the markets closed, I realized I hadn't done any work. Great. Now I'm doing overtime as my stocks crash. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/20/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( stock refreshing crash )

At work today, they had us tagging a bunch of museum artifacts. It was dorkfest, but pretty fun. Turns out though that there's a rule to the tags. You have to put them on right side up. I have to redo 1,100 stamps now. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/19/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( tags museum stamps )

At work today, someone called down to the front desk saying that they'd lost their Blackberry. We have a bin of lost stuff, so I asked what their phone looked like. "It's uh…" they started, "Black and stuff?" Then they got scared and hung up. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/19/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( blackberries lost and found liars )

At work today, some kids were having a birthday party in our restaurant. The mom had me set three extra places for each of them. "They're for Astrid's imaginary friends," she said. Hey, as long as the imaginary friends are paying, it's fine by me. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/19/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( birthday imaginary friends places )

At work today, I was stocking peas in the freezer and overheard an old man talking to his wife. "I wan't you to freeze my head in something like this when I die," he said. "Cryogenical. It's the future." She just nodded her head in silence and got a frozen pizza. I'm dumbemployed.

by wallydarling on 10/19/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( cryogenics peas freezer )

At work today, we got worried about a wildfire in the area (in Southern California). A few customers came in with swine flu style masks on. I assumed it was to protect against smoke. Then I asked them- they had no idea there were wildfires. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/18/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( wildfire southern california masks )
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