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At work today, I showed up early to restock some dresses. I heard a noise coming from the front of the store and saw some shadows. When I got there, it turned out that Ned was standing next to a mannequin. He was petting its hair over and over. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/20/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( dresses clothes mannequin )

At work today, my boss actually quit his job. He made a big scene. At first we were all scared. Then he yelled "And I'm taking my team with me!" We all stared at our computer screens until he was escorted out the building. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/20/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( quitting computer building )

At work today, I took out my old school punch card and wanted to see what would happen if I put it in upside down. Instead of just stamping the bottom half, it got stuck inside. I had to get my boss- who then had to call the company that makes the machine. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/20/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (13) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( punch card error stamping )

At work today, I tried to give my deodorant challenged coworker a message. I kept asking him if something smelled a little funny every half hour. He shrugged each time. Later, in the hall, I caught him talking. “Yeah,” he said. “I think Lindsay has a retarded nose.” I’m dumbemployed.

by walkwithalimp on 02/20/19 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( deoderant nose funny )

At work today, I was making subs par usual. Well, I had one guy come up and just stare at me. "You're pretty," he said. "Can I get you anything, sir?" He just kept staring. I made him a pastrami in hopes he'd have a heart attack. He accepted and paid for it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/19/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (12) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( sandwiches creep pastrami )

At work today, I concluded an experiment with this coffee shop customer that has a crush on me. Every day, I switch whether I say “I’ll give you room for cream,” or “No room for cream?” No matter what I say, he agrees with me every time. I’ll have to offer him ketchup next time. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/19/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( coffee shop cream ketchup )

At work today, my boss brought along Oreos. The first problem? No milk. The second problem? He likes to smile a lot. I stared at his crumb filled teeth the entire day. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/19/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (12) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( oreos teeth smiling )

At work today, I decided to play hookey. I skipped a lunch meeting and took a long walk around the lake. When I got back, the office was empty. Weird. I stayed until 6 and got a text from a coworker. Apparently, at the lunch meeting, our boss had given us the day off. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/19/19 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (12) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( playing hookey meeting text )

At work today, I was sorting through shirts donated to our resale store. My boss came up to me with a frown. "Hey, this shirt is too damaged to sell. The sleeve is too short." Of course, his own shirt had two spaghetti stains, a missing button, and no collar. I'm dumbemployed.

by im_willow2004 on 02/18/19 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( shirts stains rips )

At work today, I had a customer who ordered a vanilla sundae with hot fudge topping, caramel on the side, sprinkles, Oreo cookies mixed in, and chocolate covered bananas on top. "Anything else?" I asked. "Yeah," she said, wheezing. "Make it low fat." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/18/19 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (10) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( ice cream oreos low fat )

At work today, I was stocking shelves when a customer came up to me and asked what aisle Graham Crackers are in. I told them they were in this aisle. She looked at me confused. "But what's the aisle number?" I told her the number of the aisle we were in and she promptly left. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/18/19 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( grocery graham crackers aisle )

At work today, I was told that I should “rethink” my wardrobe because it was too dressy for casual day. I went home and came back. Then I was told I should “class it up a little.” I drove home again.  When I finally got back, I had to stay two hours late to catch up. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/18/19 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( wardrobe casual day hr )
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