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At work today, I opened the blinds only to find that it was a cloudy day outside. Bummer. When I turned back to my desk, my boss said that I'd been wasting "valuable company time." He was actually serious. I'm actually depressed. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/20/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( blinds company time depressing )

At work today, I was forced to do jury duty. So I guess that the witnesses are my customers. Well, one of them had to have the oath repeated to them three times. She couldn't remember a single sentence without help. I'm dumbemployed.

by ub7com_friender on 10/21/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (3) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( jury duty witnesses oath )

At work today, I realized I'd forgotten to brush my teeth. I have that stuff at the office, so I went in the bathroom after lunch. I would have felt a little eccentric. Then I noticed that the woman next to me was actually shaving her legs. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/16/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( teeth legs shaving )

At work today, my boss must have seen some dumb cop show. He told me to go undercover to see if anyone was shoplifting. Nobody was. I told him. "Who are you?" he said and winked. I think he thinks that's how undercover works. I'm still doing it. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/15/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( undercover shoplifter wink )

At work today, I tried resetting my computer, but it stayed locked up. Finally, I went under my desk and unplugged the thing. When I emerged, my boss was leaning over me. "You can't hide under there," he said. I slowly crawled out. I'm dumbemployed.

by shutuplisa on 10/15/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( computer desk unplugged )

At work today, I was on a flight going to Paris. My supervisor asked me to push the beverage card. Then she came up in the opposite direction with hers. Good thing she's not an air traffic controller. We hit each other. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/18/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Bosses ( flight paris stewardess )

At work today, I had my fifth anniversary party. Hurray. They got cake and everything. Then I was back at my desk reviewing the calendar. I've actually been here six years. I must have made quite the impression. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/18/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( anniversary five six )

At work today, we had a weird raffle for a tropical vacation. Only a few customers entered because of weird restrictions. Well, we drew the names. Somehow, my boss's niece won. What a strange coincidence. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/17/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Weird Shift ( rigged raffle niece )

At work today, we had a middle aged man ask where the public restroom was. We're just an ice cream stand, so I pointed him down the road. Five minutes later, I empty out the trash. Guess who's taking a pee behind the stand? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/16/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( restroom peeing gross )

At work today, we were restocking suntan lotion. Naturally, we were doing it in a special "summer themed" arrangement that was the shape of a wave. Not the best idea when you have a million bratty kids running around your store. I restacked it twice. The third time I gave up. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/17/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Overtime ( suntan lotion arrangement kids )

At work today, I was in the childrens' book section. A mom and her daughter came up, browsing through the books. I asked if they needed help. The mom wanted a book that wasn't so "dang" hard to read. I looked at it. It was meant for fifth graders. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/16/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( children books mom )

At work today, I was having a little trouble breathing, for whatever reason. It wasn't the air or me, I didn't think. I checked the air vent for the air conditioning and found the problem. Someone had forgotten to take the Styrofoam insulation out for summer. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 10/17/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (2) Permalink
Filed Under: Just Dumb ( styrofoam breathing air conditioners )
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