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At work today, I was listening to "Mo Money Mo Problems" behind the register. A guy with a sweater around his neck came up to me. "That must be the nice thing about working here," he said. "You probably don't have to worry about money problems." I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/08/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (11) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( mo money mo problems sweater jerk )

At work today, I was wiping down gym machines when I heard someone screaming. At first I thought they were hurt. Turns out they were lifting. After they were done, I went over to see what weight they were benching. Twenty five pounds flat. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/07/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (9) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( gym lifting screaming )

At work today, I was stuck handing out free samples of "delicious Parmesan cheese sticks." They were worse than they sound. But one little kid kept coming back. When I told him he had enough, he ran away. Then he came back with his mom- who proceeded to yell at me. I'm dumbemployed.

by raeraenana on 03/06/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (7) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( grocery parmesan brat )

At work today, I was serving a (white) customer a cup of coffee. I asked if he needed room for cream. He said he'd take it black. I nodded. "Once you go black, you never go back," he said and smiled. I'm Asian, but can I please still be offended? I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/05/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( coffee racism offensive )

At work today, just as I was about to go on break, a customer insisted I show her our newest vacuums. I need commissions, so I talked to her for a half hour. After that, she revealed that she "just liked to keep posted" on the market. No break for me. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/04/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (8) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( vacuums sales failure )

At work today, we had a customer come in. I didn't recognize her because she'd dyed her blonde hair red. She was offended I didn't know who she was. I told her I thought it looked good, at which point I realized that in addition to dying her hair, she'd also gotten a nosejob. I'm dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/02/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( blonde red nose job )

At work today, I edited a wedding video for a really cute couple. The dad, however, was not so cute. He called and asked me to delete my only copy. Apparently, he hates the son. The guy walking the bride down the aisle was her pastor. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/01/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (6) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( wedding editing son )

At work today, we traveled to Sturtevant, Wisconsin in order to try and find new lucky subscribers for our magazines. The weird thing? The first person I reached ordered- a middle aged woman who got two subscriptions to Playboy Magazine. For herself. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 03/01/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( wisconsin magazines playboy )

At work today, we had a customer buy a t-shirt that said “World’s Best Dad” on it. He came back in an hour later hoping to return it. Since it’s our policy, I asked him why. “I guess he died,” the customer said and shrugged. He wanted a full refund. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/28/17 at 12:52pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( t-shirt refund death )

At work today, I redid an exterior finish on a very nice foreign car (which I can’t name here). I finished doing it and decided to look inside. The owner had blown a thousand bucks on my exterior job, but the inside had a half eaten burrito right on the floor. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/27/17 at 6:20pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( cars exterior burritos )

At work today, I had a patient immediately demand that I prescribe him Codeine for upper back pain. I later found out he’s addicted to painkillers, so I was glad I told him I couldn’t. When I told him I couldn’t give him the Codeine, he nodded. “Vicodin’s fine,” he said. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/27/17 at 8:33am - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (4) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( patients hospital codeine )

At work today, some coin collectors came into our shop and said they’d pay me three bucks to look through my cash register. Apparently, they’d followed in a lady who refused to give them her fifty cent pieces. I let them look- they paid me twenty bucks for what they found. I’m dumbemployed.

by anonymous on 02/26/17 at 3:11pm - Yep, you're Dumbemployed (5) Permalink
Filed Under: Customers ( coins fifty cent pieces twenty bucks )
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